To Whom Do We Confide Our Secrets?

Slepian, Michael L.; Kirby, James N.

doi:10.1177/0146167218756032

Cited by 38 publications

(43 citation statements)

References 82 publications

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“…Jourard and Friedman [26] found that participants disclose more information as an experimenter reduced the distance to the participants by self-disclosing personal information (which could also be interpreted as reducing social distance) as well as establishing minimal physical contact. These early findings are corroborated by more recent ones, showing that the closer social network ties individuals had, the more secrets were confided in them [27]. Apparently, individuals are more likely to reveal secrets to people to whom they have close social ties, meaning to people who are spatially and socially close to them.…”

Section: Social Distance and Sharing Secretsmentioning

confidence: 60%

“…Apparently, individuals are more likely to reveal secrets to people to whom they have close social ties, meaning to people who are spatially and socially close to them. Furthermore, being compassionate and assertive predicts having secrets confined in oneself [27] and one could speculate that compassion could signal psychological proximity.…”

Section: Social Distance and Sharing Secretsmentioning

confidence: 99%

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Secretive and close? How sharing secrets may impact perceptions of distance

Jaffé¹,

Douneva²

2020

PLoS ONE

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Having secrets is incredibly common. However, secrecy has only recently started to receive more attention in research. What has largely been neglected so far are the consequences of secret-sharing for the relationship between sharer and receiver. In this project, we aim to fill this gap. Previous research has shown that closeness can make secret-sharing more likely. Building on research from the self-disclosure and relationship literature, we experimentally investigate whether secret-sharing might in turn increase perceptions of closeness. In addition, we test the valence of the secrets shared as potential driver of the hypothesized effect, as negative secrets might signal a high level of trust, but might also present a burden to the receiver. To provide a holistic picture, we build on a variety of methods to investigate three perspectives: Study 1 focuses on the receiver and tests whether another person sharing secrets (vs. nonconfidential information) decreases distance in the eyes of the receiver. Study 2 investigates lay theories and tests how an observer perceives the relationship between two people who share secrets (vs. nonconfidential information). Study 3 tests whether these lay theories about sharing secrets are predictive of behavior, and how a sharer might choose secrets of negative or positive valence to decrease perceived distance on the receiver's side. Our results will contribute to the understanding of how sharing secrets affects the way individuals think about each other, how close they feel to each other, and how they interact with each other. This is a Registered Report and may have an associated publication; please check the article page on the journal site for any related articles.

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Section: Social Distance and Sharing Secretsmentioning

confidence: 60%

Section: Social Distance and Sharing Secretsmentioning

confidence: 99%

Secretive and close? How sharing secrets may impact perceptions of distance

Jaffé¹,

Douneva²

2020

PLoS ONE

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“…Confiding is not only a type of disclosure: It is also a request for help and confidentiality (Slepian & Greenaway, 2018;Slepian & Kirby, 2018).…”

Section: Confidingmentioning

confidence: 99%

“…Emotion expression of negative emotion is mainly a strategy used for venting and catharsis (Duprez, Christophe, Rimé, Congard, & Antoine, 2015). In contrast, people confide secrets primarily as a request for help (Slepian & Kirby, 2018).…”

Section: Confidingmentioning

confidence: 99%

Confiding Secrets and Well-Being

Slepian

Moulton-Tetlock

2018

Social Psychological and Personality Science

Self Cite

104

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How does confiding secrets relate to well-being? The current work presents the first empirical examination of mechanisms by which confiding diverse real-world secrets to known others predicts well-being. We examined over 800 participants with more than 10,000 secrets in total, finding that confiding a secret does not predict reduced instances of concealment. Rather, confiding a secret predicts higher well-being through perceived coping efficacy. Correlational and experimental studies find that through confiding a secret, people feel they obtain social support and are more capable in coping with the secret. Additionally, through perceived coping efficacy, confiding a secret predicts less frequent mind wandering to the secret. Confiding predicts higher well-being through changing the way and how often people think about their secret.

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“…In an everyday context, secrets are compelling—they evoke a sense of risk and power. The way secrets affect us is highly individual, and what may be burdensome to one person may seem irrelevant to others (Slepian & Kirby, 2018). While cultural messages around holding or revealing secrets can be varied, a social narrative is that keeping secrets over the long term is ill-advised (Critcher & Ferguson, 2014).…”

Section: Introductionmentioning

confidence: 99%

Holding Secrets While Living With Life-Threatening Illness: Normalizing Patients’ Decisions to Reveal or Conceal

et al. 2019

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Communicating openly and directly about illness comes easily for some patients, whereas for others fear of disclosure keeps them silent. In this article, we discuss findings about the role of keeping secrets regarding health and illness. These findings were part of a larger project on how people with life-threatening illnesses re-story their lives. A narrative approach drawing on Frank’s dialogical narrative analysis and Riesman’s inductive approach was used. Interviews were conducted with 32 participants from three populations: chronic kidney disease, HIV/AIDS, and cancer. Findings include case exemplars which suggest keeping secrets is a social practice that acts along continuums of connecting–isolating, protecting–harming, and empowering–imprisoning. Keeping secrets about illness is a normative practice that is negotiated with each encounter. Findings call health-care providers to rethink the role of secrets for patients by considering patient privilege, a person’s right to take the lead in revealing or concealing their health and illness experience.

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To Whom Do We Confide Our Secrets?

Cited by 38 publications

References 82 publications

Secretive and close? How sharing secrets may impact perceptions of distance

Secretive and close? How sharing secrets may impact perceptions of distance

Confiding Secrets and Well-Being

Holding Secrets While Living With Life-Threatening Illness: Normalizing Patients’ Decisions to Reveal or Conceal

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