‘They could have defended my mum and me’: children’s perspectives on grandparent responses to intimate partner violence

Abstract

While children’s exposure to intimate partner violence (IPV) is a growing field of inquiry, their experiences of informal network responses have generally been overlooked. Particularly lacking are studies of grandchildren’s experiences of their relationship with their grandparents in the face of IPV. Drawing on interviews with 10 children aged 12–17, this article explores how violence-exposed children describe their relationships with their grandparents and how the older generation has responded to the abuse. The children’s stories can be interpreted as they expected their grandparents to ‘be there’ for them, to be important parts of their everyday lives, and wanted their grandparents to intervene and support them when learning of the IPV. Some grandparents intervened in helpful ways, for instance, they contributed to normality in the child’s everyday life, siding with the child and the adult victim and providing support and care. Others intervened in unhelpful ways, such as ignoring the violence, or taking the perpetrator’s side, and few intervened by attempting to end the violence. This article suggests that grandparents may, but not always, be a resource, both for violence-exposed children and professionals working with IPV.