Feeling alone in your subjectivity: Introducing the State Trait Existential Isolation Model (STEIM)

Abstract

Psychologists have devoted substantial attention to social isolation and to loneliness but only recently have psychologists begun to consider existential isolation. Existential isolation is a unique form of interpersonal isolation, related to, but distinct from loneliness and social isolation. Feeling existentially isolated is the subjective sense one is alone in one's experience, and that others cannot understand one's perspective. In the current paper, we propose a conceptual model of existential isolation and review relevant evidence. The model proposes that the experience of existential isolation can be situational, context dependent, or a trait‐like pervasive sense that others do not validate one's subjective experience. The model posits acute and chronic causes of existential isolation and consequences of the state and trait forms of it. Reactions to state existential isolation produce momentary and short‐term effects whereby an individual's sense of validation of their worldview is threatened and attempts are made to eliminate this feeling. In contrast, trait existential isolation leads to reduced identification with cultural sources of meaning and withdrawal from seeking rewarding relationships, which leads to more long‐term consequences such as chronic need depletion and deficits in well‐being. We briefly discuss potential moderators that may affect whether and when individuals experience existential isolation and possible strategies for reducing existential isolation, and recommend directions for future research.

Feeling out of (existential) place: Existential isolation and nonnormative group membership

“… 2. The findings cited here refer to the dispositional (trait) form of existential isolation—the chronic feeling of aloneness in one’s experiences. It is worth noting that existential isolation can also vary according to the situation (Helm et al, 2019); however, for the purposes of the current research, we are primarily interested in trait existential isolation. …”

Existential isolation and the struggle for belief validation

“…This unique type of shared reality – shared in‐the‐moment, subjective reality (Pinel, 2018) – proves particularly alluring to people high in existential isolation and may help them to feel more existentially connected, particularly if they experience it consistently. Additionally, moments of I‐sharing may help keep state‐induced feelings of existential isolation from evolving into a more chronic variety (Helm et al., 2018). In other research on ways of promoting existential connectedness, meditation seems to hold promise.…”

“…Despite the centrality of the need for belief validation, people sometimes struggle to meet it. One key obstacle to attaining belief validation stems from another central feature of the human condition: existential isolation (Helm, Greenberg, Park, & Pinel, 2018; Pinel, 2018; Pinel, Long, Murdoch, & Helm, 2017; Yalom, 1980). People encounter and interpret the world through their own sense organs and cognitive processes.…”

“…Certainly, everyone experiences a heightened awareness of their existential isolation from time to time, when situations remind them of it, as illustrated in the examples above (Helm et al., 2018). Feelings of existential isolation vary from one situation to another, in the form of state existential isolation.…”

Memento mori: Understanding existential anxiety through the existential pathway model

“…Existential isolation refers to “an unbridgeable gulf between oneself and any other being…and the world” (Yalom, 1980, p. 355). Included in this is the crisis of awareness that one will ultimately face death alone (Yalom, 1980), a lack of connection to others in the present moment (Glas, 2003), an acknowledgment that one experiences the world in a way that is unique only to them (Helm, Greenberg, et al, 2019), and “feeling alone in one's experience, as though no one understands us or reacts to the world in the same way as us” (p. 61, Pinel et al., 2017). The existential pathway of isolation is direct, whereby death awareness evokes feelings of being alone in the world.…”