In the nursing literature, a number of qualities are associated with loving care. Reference is made to, among other things, humility, attentiveness, responsibility and duty, compassion, and tenderness. The author attempts to show that charm, in the Marcelian sense, also plays a central role. It is argued that the moral foundation of charm is a unity of agape and eros. An impartial giving of the self for others is clearly of fundamental importance in an ethic of care. Including charm in the discussion points to the fact that eros also plays a crucial role. Eros produces a passion for people and for life. It is a physical and spiritual energy that animates a person in all facets of her life, including her caring work.
It is argued that when spiritual care by physicians is linked to the empirical research indicating the salutary effect on health of religious beliefs and practices an unintended degradation of religion is involved. It is contended that it is much more desirable to see support for the patient's spirituality as part of holistic care. A proposal for appropriate spiritual care by physicians is offered.
The aim in the article is to demonstrate how insights from Christian ethics and Buddhist philosophy can make contributions to the management of compassion fatigue. There are already helpful resources available that provide principles, tips, and practical guidelines for self-care. The approach here is centered on attitudinal, ethical, and philosophical issues. From the Christian tradition, the ethical principle of "equal regard" is employed. Equal regard is the notion that agape (disinterested, universal love) requires of a people that they love others neither more nor less than they love themselves. When the ethical principle that a nurse operates out of in her everyday life is self-sacrifice, self-care is much less likely to be set as a personal priority. From the Buddhist tradition, the principle of compassion with equanimity is engaged. The Buddhist ideal is opening oneself to the pain of the other while maintaining calmness or stillness of mind. It is contended that inculcation of this skill means that a nurse can be exposed to suffering without running down their store of compassion.
A central feature of the life of the Trinity is contrast without conflict: God is three and God is one. This dynamic has a spatial reference. The Three draw close to each other in the intimacy of love, but they also give each other space to be. This dynamic is a necessary condition for mature relationships on the human level. It is argued that effective pastoral counseling involves both moving in close through empathy and acceptance, and creating appropriate distance through a process that Martin Buber refers to as confirmation. Confirmation involves wrestling with the other person to help her or him actualize her or his God-given moral and spiritual potential.
The author explores the Christian doctrine of the Trinity to shed light on the nature of the pastoral ministry. Using the trinitarian term, "polyphony" (David Cunningham) for this purpose, he explicates unity and difference as key polyphonic categories in the doctrine of the Trinity. The author suggests that the polyphonic notes sounded by pastoral caregivers are toughness and tenderness, woundedness and health, wisdom and folly, and communion, nearness and distance.
While perfectionism has been associated with guilt dynamics, the form of perfectionism that is most frequently discussed by psychologists is connected to selfcondemnation for perceived failures to reach the high standard set for personal achievement. There is therefore a strong link between perfectionism and inferiority shame. Psychotherapists have given quite a bit of attention to shame-based perfectionism; it has been largely neglected by pastoral psychologists. Three approaches to the pastoral care of shame-based perfectionism are developed. The first approach is based in cognitive therapy. It is argued that perfectionism is grounded in a faulty core belief about the self-namely, "I am what I achieve." The second method makes use of strategies developed by John Bradshaw for accepting and affirming all one's sub-selves. Bradshaw's approach is critiqued, however, for the way in which shame-based and guilt-based perfectionism are confused. The third method is a modification and adaptation of Heinz Kohut's strategy of "mirroring" (empathy, admiration, and approval) that he developed for use in work with clients with narcissistic personality disorder.
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