He saw people...as careless and as indifferent about the name they imposed upon their child, or more so, than in the choice of Ponto or Cupid for their puppy dog.(Laurence Sterne, The life and opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman)[1] The authors contributed equally to this work and the order of authorship is alphabetical.We are grateful to Jim Sholicar and Ted Briscoe for providing the noun statistics from Longmans Dictionary, and they acknowledge the Longman Group Inc. for allowing access to the machine-readable version of the dictionary. We further thank Ian Nimmo-Smith for statistical advice.