Solomon's mothers: A special case of pathological bereavement.

Abstract

Giving up a child for adoption presents a serious emotional and psychological challenge for the mother. Using the components of normal grieving, this paper illustrates the ways in which the bereavement process was distorted and delayed in 22 women seen in psychotherapy who had earlier given up a child. Recommendations are offered for facilitating a healthy mourning process in the relinquishing mother.

To whom does the fetus or baby belong?: Surrogate motherhood and family psychology/therapy

“…One needs to regard these post hoc reflections with at least a degree of caution (Beckford, 1978), especially as these women and others like them have become active participants in the antisurrogacy movement. Millen and Roll (1985), in their discussion of women who had given up their children for adoption, emphasized parallels to the bereavement process in reaction to the death of a loved one. Although there are some differences between their clinical sample and the women who voluntarily become surrogate mothers, there seems to be validity to their statement that "like the grieving person, the relinquishing mother's guilt and anger at herself intensifies with the passage of time as she comprehends her role in setting up her loss and the consequent feelings of remorse and grief" (p. 414).…”

Postadoptive Reactions of the Relinquishing Mother: A Review

“…Relinquishing mothers display characteristics that typify the normal grief response, but the grief experienced by these women is often prolonged and may actually intensify over time (Davis, 1994;Millen & Roll, 1985). Additionally, the relinquishing mother passes through these stages before delivery and again after relinquishment (Lamperelli & Smith, 1979).…”

“…Lack of social acceptance of the grief response in relinquishing mothers also contributes to chronic, pathologic grief (Davis, 1994;Millen & Roll, 1985). Because society views the relinquishment of an infant as a voluntary choice, there is no acknowledgment that a loss has occurred, and thus no expectation for the birth mother to go through a grief process with subsequent adjustment (Davis, 1994;Lauderdale & Boyle, 1994).…”

“…If the intense grief reaction becomes prolonged, it may manifest itself in psychosomatic complaints as well as secondary illness (Blanton & Deschner, 1990;Condon, 1986). These physical responses include recurrent gynecologic infections, frequent or severe headaches, somatic symptoms, and sexual difficulties (Blanton & Deschner, 1990;Burnell & Norfleet, 1979;Millen & Roll, 1985;Rynearson, 1982). Secondary infertility also may be a problem (Deykin et al, 1984;Lancette & McClure, 1992).…”

The Adoption Alternative for Pregnant Adolescents: Decision Making, Consequences, and Policy Implications

“…Participants in Millen and Roll's (1985) study were 22 women who had placed a child for adoption, were currently in therapy for from 3 to 24 months, and whose presenting problem was something other than the adoptive experience. No information was presented on the age of the women, how old they were at the time of placement, when the placement occurred, or any other demographics.…”