Reasons for (Non)engagement in Infidelity

A Critical Examination of Popular Assumptions About the Benefits and Outcomes of Monogamous Relationships

“…In a sample of undergraduates currently involved in a romantic relationship, 40% of participants knew that a relationship partner had cheated on them, 41% reported that they have never had a relationship partner cheat on them, and 19% reported that they were unsure whether they have ever had a partner cheat on them (Emmers-Sommer, Warber, & Halford, 2010). Furthermore, 68% of undergraduate heterosexual men have cheated on a partner by kissing a person outside of the relationship and 49% have cheated on a partner by having intercourse with another person while in a "monogamous" relationship (Wiederman & Hurd, 1999).…”

Exploring intergenerational patterns of infidelity

“…Because of this, researchers have begun to focus attention on possible reasons for engaging in infidelity behavior. Emmers‐Sommer, Warber, and Halford () found that participants reported over 1,000 reasons to cheat (compared to over 500 reasons to remain faithful). Specifically, the researchers found that lack of satisfaction, better alternatives, and personal disposition were the reasons most often provided for why individuals would be likely to cheat.…”

“…Specifically, the researchers found that lack of satisfaction, better alternatives, and personal disposition were the reasons most often provided for why individuals would be likely to cheat. Participants also reported that fear of sanctions motivated individuals to stay faithful rather than commitment to the relationship itself (Emmers‐Sommer et al, ). In order for researchers and therapists to better understand infidelity and devise strategies to help individuals and couples cope with the experience of infidelity, further research is needed to understand both individual and contextual risk factors associated with infidelity.…”

The Palgrave Handbook of the Psychology of Sexuality and Gender

“…Emmers-Sommer and colleagues outline such consequences as sanctions that are social (disappointing one's family), legal (experiencing divorce complications), relational (hurting one's partner and possibly terminating the relationship), and personal (feeling shame or guilt for one's actions), which serve to correct and/or punish behaviours that deviate from societal norms. Likewise, social, relational, and institutional frameworks pressure individuals to avoid extradyadic sexual encounters and reinforce the notion that an individual will "lose it all" if he or she strays from traditional norms of monogamy (Emmers-Sommer et al, 2010;Weaver, 2007). For instance, infidelity is the most common trigger for breakups in heterosexual relationships (Metts, 1994) and same-sex unions (Kurdek, 1991) and divorce among married couples (Amato & Previti, 2003).…”

“…Although it is likely that different people have different motivations for upholding a monogamous agreement, one potential explanation is to avoid the undesirable consequences of engaging in infidelity (Emmers-Sommer et al, 2010). Emmers-Sommer and colleagues outline such consequences as sanctions that are social (disappointing one's family), legal (experiencing divorce complications), relational (hurting one's partner and possibly terminating the relationship), and personal (feeling shame or guilt for one's actions), which serve to correct and/or punish behaviours that deviate from societal norms.…”