Making Choices in Discourse: New Alternative Masculinities Opposing the “Warrior’s Rest”

Abstract

Psychology research on men studies, attractiveness, and partner preferences has evolved from the influence of sociobiological perspectives to the role of interactions in shaping election toward sexual–affective relationships and desire toward different kinds of masculinities. However, there is a scientific gap in how language and communicative acts among women influence the kind of partner they feel attracted to and in the reproduction of relationship double standards, like the myth of the “warrior’s rest” where female attractiveness to “bad boys” is encouraged or supported. Some women imitate “the warrior” behavior of men by choosing dominant traditional masculinities (DTM) to have “fun” with and oppressed traditional masculinities (OTM) for “rest” after the “fun” with DTM—choosing an OTM for a stable relationship, but perhaps without passion, while also feeling attraction toward DTM, a response which perpetuates the chauvinist double standard that the feminist movement has condemned when men behave in this sexist way. Through conducting a qualitative study with communicative daily life stories, this article explores, on the one hand, how language and social interaction among women can lead to the reproduction of the DTM role by women and, on the other hand, also how new alternative masculinities (NAM) offer an alternative by explicitly rejecting, through the language of desire, to be the rest for the female warrior, the second fiddle to any woman. This has the potential to become a highly attractive alternative to DTM. Findings provide new knowledge through the analysis of communicative acts and masculinities evidencing the importance of language uses in the reproduction of the double standards in gender relations and to understand how and why these practices are maintained and which kind of language uses can contribute to preventing them. Implications for research and interventions on preventive socialization of gender violence are discussed.

The Consequences of Disdainful Hook-Ups for Later Egalitarian Relationships of Girls

“…Whereas those who respond to a traditional oppressed masculinity have been reported to suffer these consequences more often, men who show attitudes of a new alternative masculinity do not tolerate them and leave these relationships. This finding is consistent with recent research that has pointed out new alternative masculinities stand against double moral standards [ 29 ] and humiliation or despisal towards them [ 30 ].…”

“…Our results also point to the importance of working with men to help them to identify these types of situations and not accept this treatment. In this sense, scientific research has also shown how men with a new alternative masculinity [ 22 ] do not accept double standards and help to overcome the pattern in which some women reproduce the behavior of traditional dominant masculinities [ 26 , 29 ] and only want egalitarian and passionate relationships [ 34 ].…”

Evidence of Gender Violence Negative Impact on Health as a Lever to Change Adolescents’ Attitudes and Preferences towards Dominant Traditional Masculinities

“…In this regard, the role of boys in preventing adolescent dating violence has been emphasized in community-based intervention programs to improve adolescents’ health and wellbeing [ 23 ]. Other studies have differentiated between three different types of masculinity to understand the role of men in gender violence: dominant traditional masculinities (DTM), oppressed traditional masculinities (OTM), and new alternative masculinities (NAM) [ 24 , 25 , 26 , 27 ]. DTM represent inegalitarian, dominant, and violent attitudes of men that can lead to gender violence, but that at the same time are associated with attractiveness in the dominant coercive discourse socially transmitted.…”

Young People’s Voices and Science for Overcoming Toxic Relationships Represented in Sex Education

“…Young people who interact with scientists on the subject of contact with science in sexual and emotional relationships and health issues can provide young people with a tool that allows them to analyse and identify DTM [ 34 , 40 ] and so allows them to differentiate unhealthy relationships from healthy ones. This is an identification that, in addition to applying to relationships in fiction, can also be applied in real life, as the young people interviewed in this research have.…”

“…This type of masculinity is characterised by self-confidence, bravery, and courage [ 34 ]. Furthermore, this masculinity shows rejection of negative attitudes such as sexism, racism, and double standards [ 39 , 40 ]. Therefore, this masculinity publicly rejects non-egalitarian attitudes.…”