“It May Not Be Pretty, But It's Honest”: Examining Parental Grief on the Callapitter Blog

Abstract

Following the death of a child, parents are turning to alternative means of communication to express their grief In this instrumental case study, the authors explore how 1 woman, Amy Ambrusko, communicates her grief experience on her blog, emotionally negotiating loss and parental grief. Guided by M. S. Miles's (1984) parental grief model, the authors argue that the Callapitter blog serves as a case study illustration of online parental grief. Specifically, Ambrusko displays parental grief in three ways: (re)questioning reality, experiencing discursive and corporeal guilt, and rationalizing a "new normal." This analysis highlights the changing nature of communicating about grief and underscores how grief blogs challenge contemporary social death rules.

“I didn't know her, but…”: parasocial mourning of mediated deaths on Facebook RIP pages

“…In the RIP context this might lead to some parts of a deceased person's social circle feeling upset about communication by other members of the circle (such as parents versus friends). Furthermore, the family might not be able to control what is being said about the deceased, particular if they are not themselves the administrators of a RIP page, and they cannot prevent strangers, and in worst-case Internet trolls from infiltrating these pages with the sole purpose of provoking emotional response from those in mourning (DeGroot, 2013;Marwick & Ellison, 2012;Phillips, 2011). This points to the emergence of another paradox growing out of the SNS mourning practices: friends and families might rightfully feel entitled to have the rights to control and express their grief "in peace" on various forms of SNS pages created in memory of their loved ones, while strangers might equally feel entitled to use at least the often public RIP pages as "go-to-spaces" where they can pay their respect and openly express their curiosity, perhaps not always in fact aware how their activity will affect those with intimate relations to the deceased.…”

Exploiting Loss?: Ethical Considerations, Boundaries, and Opportunities for the Study of Death and Grief Online

“…Should web page and blog addresses be reported in the reference page? Research that focuses specifically on grief blogs and web pages does report the complete name of the blog and/or the names of authors (DeGroot & Carmack, 2012, 2013de Vries & Rutherford, 2004;Hoover, Hastings, & Musambira, 2009;Musambira, Hastings, & Hoover, 2006. If researchers frame the Internet as a public space where names are appropriate to use, then using the names of authors and providing web page and blogs in the citation list does not violate privacy issues.…”

“…When does a blogger become a "public figure?" In our research (DeGroot & Carmack, 2013), one of the bloggers was very open about the situation described on her blog, and she participated in several interviews for newspapers (all available online and very easy to find); the blogger even appeared on Oprah to talk about her blog. Does this qualify her as a public figure, thus allowing researchers to examine her blog as a public source just like we might examine a celebrity's communication during a Larry King Live interview or on a celebrity's Twitter?…”

“…Recently, several scholars have begun to explore the ways in which we communicate about death and grief online, focusing on blogs and social media sites (DeGroot & Carmack, 2012, 2013, online grief forums (Hastings, Hoover, & Musambira, 2005;Hastings, Musambira, & Hoover, 2007;Hoover, Hastings, & Musambira, 2009;Musambira, Hastings, & Hoover, 2007;Smartwood, McCarthy Veach, Kuhne, Lee, & Ji, 2011), funeral webpages, and other electronic spaces. As evidenced by the dates of these articles, communication research exploring the intersections of death or grief and computer-mediated communication is a recent phenomenon.…”

“…Do researchers need to make authors aware of the fact that they, or other researchers, are analyzing their blogs? When researching one public blog that followed a parent's grief following the death of her children (DeGroot & Carmack, 2013), we considered the following questions: Are we violating a blogger's privacy by writing about her blog? Are we representing his or her experiences in an appropriate manner?…”