What is known on the subject:• Alcohol addiction is manifested by periods of abstinence and relapse in which the individual returns to previous problematic alcohol use. This may lead to unstable and stressful routines for the family and for women who live with a spouse diagnosed with an AUD.• AUD may mentally and physically affect women living with a spouse diagnosed with AUD. However, most studies have focused on the influence of AUD in general, and the way they cope with it; few have dealt with the experience of relapse as a distinctive stage. What the paper adds to existing knowledge:• Women's experiences of their spouses' relapses are embedded within their broader life experience in the shadow of alcohol addiction.• The pattern of transitions from closeness to distance in the ways women think, feel and actively respond to their spouses' relapses shows similarities with the ways in which individuals cope with repeated trauma. This helps relate these women's experiences of their spouses' repeated relapses to the potential complex trauma these women experience and leads to a better understanding of the internal emotional dynamics of these women's behavioural patterns. What are the implications for practice:• These women need a therapeutic solution that can help them cope with longstanding emotional burdens.• Therapists should be sensitive to the complexity of their experience. When relevant, therapy should be based on therapeutic strategies from trauma practice, along with Alcohol Behavioural Couples Therapy that can reinforce the couple's mutual efforts to achieve sobriety or reduce AUD severity

ObjectiveThis study explored the perceptions, lived experiences, and coping approaches of women who live with spouses who have alcohol use disorder (AUD) in response to implicit and explicit messages from professionals and others in their environment.BackgroundWomen who live with a spouse with AUD are affected by their spouses' behavior and experience high levels of mental stress. These women are viewed as problem‐solvers and rescuers, on the one hand, or as enablers and “codependents” on the other. These attitudes may reflect society's ideas of women's gender‐related caretaking role.MethodSemistructured interviews were conducted with 12 women whose spouses had a diagnosis of lifetime AUD.ResultsContent analysis yielded three themes regarding the kinds of messages the women received: responsible and guilty, distanced and silenced, and reinforced and supported. The women indicated internalization of these messages and expressed they felt guilty, ashamed, and excluded, but in some cases, strengthened.ConclusionSociety and the people around these women bear responsibility for the negative images they internalize.ImplicationsAwareness of the implicit and explicit messages conveyed to these women is needed. Specific interventions should be designed to validate their difficulties and support them.