Aim The counselling relationship is important for engaging young people, but more understanding about how young people experience this in the context of school counselling is necessary. This study explored young people's understanding of the counselling relationship in two New Zealand schools. Method Twenty‐two participants between the ages of 16 and 18 took part in unstructured narrative interviews on their experience of school counselling. The data were analysed to identify themes related specifically to participants’ experience of the counselling relationship. Findings Five themes highlighting positive aspects of the relationship with the school counsellor were identified; young people's experiences of a genuine connection with a counsellor, the experience of being listened to, availability and accessibility of the counsellor on site at school, the counsellor's belief in the young person and the counsellor's potential to be an advocate for the young person in the school context. Negative experiences of the counselling relationship were described in the absence of these features. Conclusions and implications for practice The “School counsellor” has the potential to be experienced as a “refuge” for young people in the context of a hierarchical and evaluative school environment, within which they can feel accepted, understood and safe. Accessibility and the counsellor's ability to serve as an advocate in the school context means school counselling can be an important primary care intervention for young people in distress.