When faced with a taboo stressor, people might have desires for support yet feel reticent to seek assistance from others. This study contextualizes desires for support by theorizing that they are directly associated with the support people seek and indirectly associated with what they receive. There may be discrepancies among any of these perspectives, and we expand research on support gaps by considering the existence and outcomes of deficits or surpluses in the support people desire, seek, and receive. A community sample (N = 205) completed a survey regarding a taboo marital stressor. Respondents desired more support than they sought or received (i.e., support deficit) but received more support than they sought (i.e., support surplus). These discrepancies and their outcomes varied by type and source of support. Whereas deficits in support mostly decreased reappraisal of a taboo stressor, support surpluses mainly enhanced reappraisal. Implications for research on supportive communication are discussed.

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Unintended pregnancies constitute potentially stigmatizing moments that mobilize desires for several types of support from multiple members of people's networks. This study examines gaps among the support people desire, expect, and receive when coping with an unintended pregnancy. The support gaps people experience can influence their feelings about the pregnancy and their perceptions of stigma surrounding it. People (N = 203) who recently experienced an unintended pregnancy reported in an online survey the supportive communication they experienced from their romantic partner, mother/maternal figure, and close friend at the time of the unintended pregnancy. People experienced gaps among the amounts of support they desired, expected, and received, and the nature of gaps varied by the provider and type of support under consideration. Males and females perceived different gaps that varied according to their roles associated with an unintended pregnancy. The gaps people experienced contributed to their perceptions of stigma and affect improvement surrounding the pregnancy.

Opioid use disorder (OUD) is a leading cause of accidental death in the U.S., and people with OUD may rely on romantic partners to dyadically cope with their illness. Guided by the communication theory of identity, this study examines the identity tensions experienced by couples managing OUD and how identity negotiations contribute to couples’ efforts to dyadically cope with OUD. Semi-structured interviews were conducted with 19 dyads and 6 individuals ( N = 44), all of whom were in relationships in which at least one partner was managing OUD. Analyses revealed that couples managing OUD experience three types of identity gaps: personal–relational, relational–enacted, and relational–communal identity gaps. These gaps coalesced around a central theme of couple identity paradoxes, which demonstrated the opportunities and potential downsides of dyadically coping with OUD. Findings deepen theoretical understanding of identity negotiation in couples and the role of relational identities in managing illness.