What is self-love? Redefinition of a controversial construct.

Abstract

Self-love is a controversial construct: Throughout history, views on self-love have been polarized as "good" (associated with well-being and health) versus "bad" (associated with narcissism and selfishness). Although predominately equated in academic literature, self-love and narcissism are in fact opposites. However, there is a lack of adequate research, debate, and empirical work on the construct of self-love and its contributing factors. We attempted to address the limitations of previous studies and aim to propose a methodologically sound model of self-love. Arguing that psychotherapists benefit from a broad and differentiated understanding of self-love, we administered 13 semistructured interviews with regular psychotherapists, psychotherapist authors of books or journal articles on self-love, and psychotherapists/coaches with long experience in group work on self-love. Interview questions focused on specifying self-love and its components. An inductive thematic analysis yielded a preliminary model with three main themes: (a) self-contact, defined as giving attention to oneself; (b) self-acceptance, defined as being at peace with oneself; and (c) self-care, defined as being protective of and caring for oneself. We first validated the findings with the same sample of experts and then assessed our preliminary model's consistency with the existing literature and its comprehensiveness, before augmenting and modifying the model to arrive at a final model of self-love. The relationships with other self-related constructs such as selfcompassion and self-esteem are further examined. Results shed new light on the construct and provide a basis for further research examining the link between self-love, psychological health, and well-being.

Narcissistic traits and compassion: Embracing oneself while devoiding others

“…To be precise, the hypothesis that grandiose narcissistic traits would aid in increasing SC after the inductions (hypothesis i) was not supported by the main analyses. While the exact reasons for this are unclear, it may relate to narcissism maladaptive processing of devaluation ( Funk, 2018 ), in which self-worth is dependent on external input and the lack results in scarce self-love ( Fromm, 2013 ; Henschke and Sedlmeier, 2021 ). Following this line of reasoning, it seems that without the external input, there may be an inherent inability to solace the self and internalize compassion in the absence of extrinsic guidance and validation.…”

A closer look at the relationships between aspects of connectedness and flourishing

“…Self-love was measured with the Self-love questionnaire ( Henschke and Sedlmeier, n.d. ). It consisted of 27 items (example item: I feel fine the way I am) and must be answered on a 5-point Likert scale ranging from 1 = not true at all to 5 = completely true .…”

“…Regarding the relationship between self-love and the other aspects of connectedness investigated here, pro-socialness and nature connectedness, one study found positive associations between self-care and altruistic and pro-ecological behavior ( Corral-Verdugo et al, 2021 ). The constructs in this study differ from the constructs in the present study: We used the broader concept of self-love whereas Corral-Verdugo et al (2021) used self-care which is one component of self-love ( Henschke and Sedlmeier, 2021 ). Moreover, altruistic behavior is only one aspect of prosocial behavior and in our study, nature connectedness was used instead of pro-ecological behavior.…”

“…In a qualitative interview study with Spanish-speaking adults from the US, self-love was associated with well-being ( Hernandez et al, 2016 ). Henschke and Sedlmeier (2021) define self-love as an attitude of self-kindness, including self-contact, self-acceptance, and self-care. Self-contact is defined as giving attention to and awareness of oneself whereas self-acceptance is being at peace with oneself and self-care being protective of and caring for oneself ( Henschke and Sedlmeier, 2021 ).…”

“… Henschke and Sedlmeier (2021) define self-love as an attitude of self-kindness, including self-contact, self-acceptance, and self-care. Self-contact is defined as giving attention to and awareness of oneself whereas self-acceptance is being at peace with oneself and self-care being protective of and caring for oneself ( Henschke and Sedlmeier, 2021 ). Regarding the relationship between self-love and the other aspects of connectedness investigated here, pro-socialness and nature connectedness, one study found positive associations between self-care and altruistic and pro-ecological behavior ( Corral-Verdugo et al, 2021 ).…”