Too Good to be Liked? When and How Prosocial Others are Disliked

Abstract

Outstandingly prosocial individuals may not always be valued and admired, but sometimes depreciated and rejected. While prior research has mainly focused on devaluation of highly competent or successful individuals, comparable research in the domain of prosociality is scarce. The present research suggests two mechanisms why devaluation of extreme prosocial individuals may occur: they may (a) constitute very high comparison standards for observers, and may (b) be perceived as communal narcissists. Two experiments test these assumptions. We confronted participants with an extreme prosocial or an ordinary control target and manipulated comparative aspects of the situation (salient vs. non-salient comparison, Experiment 1), and narcissistic aspects of the target (showing off vs. being modest, Experiment 2). Consistent with our assumptions, the extreme prosocial target was liked less than the control target, and even more so when the comparison situation was salient (Experiment 1), and when the target showed off with her good deeds (Experiment 2). Implications that prosociality does not always breed more liking are discussed.

Bidirectional Associations of Prosocial Behavior with Peer Acceptance and Rejection in Adolescence

“…With regard to the longitudinal associations between peer acceptance and prosocial behavior, the cross-lagged panel analysis showed that prosocial behavior positively predicted peer acceptance over time, but peer acceptance did not predict future prosocial behavior. Contrary to some findings suggesting that, in some cases, prosocial behavior can elicit dislike from others (e.g., Boileau et al, 2021 ), the results of this study show that engaging in friendly, kind behaviors such as sharing, helping, or comforting others, helps adolescents gain more acceptance from their peers. However, no evidence was found that being well-liked led to increases in prosocial behavior.…”

“…Indeed, recent findings have shown that prosocial behavior could even decrease peer acceptance. In an experiment with university students, being outstandingly prosocial was found to decrease acceptance (e.g., likeability) and provoke rejection (Boileau et al, 2021 ). Likewise, using four different data sets, it has been demonstrated that individuals who were particularly generous in a public goods game became excluded by the group (Parks & Stone, 2010 ).…”

“…Likewise, using four different data sets, it has been demonstrated that individuals who were particularly generous in a public goods game became excluded by the group (Parks & Stone, 2010 ). These negative effects of prosociality on status are explained by the fact that exceptionally generous individuals set a high standard for behavior, making peers look bad in comparison and thereby eliciting rejection (Boileau et al, 2021 ; Parks & Stone, 2010 ). Therefore, it is not yet clear whether behaving prosocially leads to more acceptance or rejection.…”

Looking into Communal Narcissism: Narcissistic Sanctity and Heroism

“…Helping others could be used to self-enhance (Italiano, 2017;Konrath et al, 2016;Nacheva, 2019), and narcissism levels increase after helping others (Giacomin & Jordan, 2014). In addition, extremely prosocial people are perceived as communal narcissists (Boileau et al, 2021).…”