Environmental damage caused by waste plastics and downstream chemical breakdown products is a modern crisis. Endocrine‐disrupting bisphenol A (BPA), found in breakdown products of poly(bisphenol A carbonate) (PC), is an especially pernicious example that interferes with the reproduction and development of a wide range of organisms, including humans. Herein we report a single‐stage thiocracking method to chemically upcycle polycarbonate using elemental sulfur, a waste product of fossil fuel refining. Importantly, this method disintegrates bisphenol A units into monoaryls, thus eliminating endocrine‐disrupting BPA from the material and from any potential downstream waste. Thiocracking of PC (10 wt%) with elemental sulfur (90 wt%) at 320 °C yields the highly crosslinked network SPC90. The composition, thermal, morphological, and mechanical properties of SPC90 were characterized by FT‐IR spectroscopy, TGA, DSC, elemental analysis, SEM/EDX, compressive strength tests, and flexural strength tests. The composite SPC90 (compressive strength = 12.8 MPa, flexural strength = 4.33 MPa) showed mechanical strengths exceeding those of commercial bricks and competitive with those of mineral cements. The approach discussed herein represents a method to chemically upcycle polycarbonate while deconstructing BPA units, and valorizing waste sulfur to yield structurally viable building materials that could replace less‐green legacy materials.