“The Story” of a Death: Therapeutic Considerations With Bereaved Families

Abstract

Facilitating and listening to bereaved families tell “The Story” of their loss is an important component of therapeutic work with bereaved families. Following a discussion of the general functions of stories, the authors use a variety of case examples to illustrate how “The Story” can be used as an assessment device, as an initial intervention, and as a gauge of the progress of treatment. Family stories of loss are conceptualized as constructions, and the emphasis is on how individual and family context affect and are affected by these stories. Throughout the paper, particular attention is paid to ways stories canbe useful for children in families.

Bereaved Parents' Negotiation of Identity Following the Death of a Child

“…According to Hastings (2000), sharing memories about the deceased child allows parents to work through identity changes and brings a degree of coherence and purpose to their fractured lives. Similarly, Sedney, Baker, and Gross (1994) argued that telling the story of the child's death over and over allows parents to incorporate the child's death into their own personal narratives and life histories.…”

The Role of Communication and Story Telling in the Family Grieving System

“…R. Silverman et al, 1995). However, Sedney et al (1994) asserted that it is important for children to hear the story. By not talking, adults deprive children of the information needed to facilitate understanding, leaving them to create their own-often bizarre and untrue-stories in their minds (Sedney et al, 1994).…”

“…However, Sedney et al (1994) asserted that it is important for children to hear the story. By not talking, adults deprive children of the information needed to facilitate understanding, leaving them to create their own-often bizarre and untrue-stories in their minds (Sedney et al, 1994). A parent's unwillingness to talk about a dead sibling, for example, may lead remaining children to interpret the parent's behavior as an accusation that somehow they are at fault (Gibbons, 1992).…”

“…S. M. Silverman and Silverman (1979) observed that a family's experience of managing to continue as a unit following the death of the husband/father facilitates their ability to face the death and its significance over time. Sedney, Baker, and Gross (1994) stated that a family's progress through the grief process can be monitored by listening for changes over time in their collective story about the death.…”

Parental Grief and Marital Issues Aftermath: A Pilot Study

“…The communication among bereaved parents post-loss is a primary ways of meaning -making (Bosticco & Thompson, 2005;Sedney, Baker, & Gross, 1994). However, after the death of a child, communication can be difficult (Brabant, Forsyth, & McFarlain, 1995;Hastings, 2000).…”