The Intergenerational Relationships of Gay Men and Lesbian Women

Abstract

Reczek, C. (2014). The intergenerational relationships of gay men and lesbian women. Journals of Gerontology, Series B: Psychological Sciences and Social Sciences, 69(6), 909-919, doi:10.1093 Objectives. Despite the demonstrated importance of intergenerational ties across the life course, few studies examine relationships between gay men and lesbians and their later life parents and parents-in-law. The present study examines how midlife to later life gay men and lesbians in intimate partnerships conceptualize these intergenerational ties.Method. Qualitative analysis of 50 in-depth interviews collected with midlife to later life gay men and lesbians (ages 40-72) in long-term intimate partnerships.Results. Findings reveal 4 central ways respondents describe supportive parent-child and parent-child in-law relationships: integration, inclusion through language, social support, and affirmations. Findings reveal 3 central ways individuals distinguish strained parent-child and parent-child in-law relationships: rejection in everyday life, traumatic events, and the threat of being usurped. Findings further articulate how intergenerational ambivalence is distinguished through descriptions of a parent as simultaneously supportive (via subthemes of solidarity) and rejecting (via subthemes of strain).Discussion. Findings from this study provide empirical evidence of how support, strain, and ambivalence in intergenerational ties are identified and experienced by gay men and lesbian women. This study reveals a new lens to view relationships between midlife to later life adults and their aging parents and parents-in-law and further identifies linkages between solidarity-conflict and ambivalence paradigms.

Exploring Ambivalence in Family Ties: Progress and Prospects

“…Qualitative analyses prove pivotal to understanding ambivalence in going beyond reports of feelings or attitudes, allowing subjects to tell the story of their relationships (Reczek, ). This focus on ambivalence as a property of relationships rather than as a variable at the individual level helps advance our understanding of the link between psychological ambivalence and meso and macro processes (Bulanda, ; Katz et al, ).…”

Gay and Lesbian Adults' Relationship With Parents in Germany

“…Gay and lesbian children's intergenerational relationships—or family ties in general—are likely to be challenged by unique adversities, raising the question about the extent to which empirical findings based on theoretical models that have been shown to be powerful in explaining parent–child relations in “standard” (heterosexual) families also hold in “non‐standard” (homosexual) family contexts (cf. Reczek, ).…”

Where Are the Adult Children of LGBTQ Parents? A Critical Review

“…Adults raised by an LGBTQ parent or parents negotiate their life trajectories in concert with “linked” others (e.g., parents, relatives, friends) who may have different views of family, inclusion, discrimination, identity formation, and belonging (Hammack & Cohler, ; Lewis, ). Some adult children may retain relationships with extended family members whose political views and social expectations are different from those of their own parents (see Reczek, ). As they enter the labor market and build community identities, these adult children will also encounter institutions (e.g., universities, workplaces, community organizations) that remain heteronormative despite ostensibly increased social acceptance for LGBTQ identities.…”

“…Still others may feel ambivalent about their belonging in states that articulate or even legislate heteronormativity. Life events such as partnering and raising children could heighten ambivalence during adulthood (Connidis, ; Hosking et al, ; Reczek, , ). In addressing these various forms of ambivalence, we seek to answer Connidis's () call to examine the ambivalence occurring in LGBTQ‐parent families at multiple levels beyond the family unit itself.…”

“…Children's feelings and eventual choices about marriage may be influenced by witnessing their parents' experiences as sexual citizens. For adult children of LGBTQ parents, “it may be that other types of structural shifts—such as larger institutional shifts in same‐sex marriage laws, nondiscrimination ordinances, or the birth of a child—alter relationships with family members that reveal or dissipate ambivalence” (Reczek, , p. 654). Most children of LGBTQ parents feel that they have a stake in marriage equality laws (Goldberg & Kuvalanka, ), and they report feeling more able to see their original family units as real and valid when same‐sex marriage is legal (Hosking et al, ).…”