The Experience of the Infant Entering Refuge (Shelter) Setting with Their Mothers After Fleeing Family Violence

Abstract

Almost nothing is known about how the infant may experience being in a women's Refuge (Shelter) setting with their mother after fleeing family violence, despite the high numbers of infants and young children in Refuges or Shelters. This research was concerned with exploring how the infant experienced refuge within a Refuge setting post family violence. Using a non-intrusive, ethically informed, 'infant led' approach, this research involved ten infants (aged 3 weeks to 16 months), ten mothers, and 13 staff in eight Refuges from three countries: Australia, Scotland and England. Data was collected through infant observation, interviews with mothers and then staff. Presented is a synthesis of a research methodology which was led by the infant, drew on concepts of 'inter-subjectivity' and used a constructivist grounded theory method. Infants were often lost from view within the Refuge setting. The mother, herself traumatised, was expected to be the refuge for her infant. Only the obviously distressed infant was assisted, and where available, from outside specialist workers. It was often too painful for the adults, both mothers and staff, to see or reflect on the infant's possible trauma. Significantly, in all cases the motivation for each mother to enter Refuge was ensuring their infant's safety. Concern for their infant or young child can be a powerful catalyst for women leaving a violent relationship. Refuges (Shelters) are in a unique position to respond to the infant in their own right whilst helping to heal and grow the infant/ mother relationship.

Living through family violence in Australia: An integrative literature review of children’s mental health outcomes.

“…Although previous studies have emphasized the impact of short-term DFV on children’s outcomes when they are exposed in early childhood (Fogarty et al, 2020; Skinner et al, 2019), reduced exposure to a violent parent, including through separation, has been shown to improve the outcomes of both mother and child, with the former expressing relief at no longer having to cope with their ex-partner’s abuse (Bunston et al, 2021; McInnes, 2004). Significantly, more children developed greater emotional–behavioral resilience following exposure to IPV early in life if they were no longer exposed at ages three and four (Fogarty et al, 2020), while children’s repeated exposure to abuse between parents was linked to a greater likelihood of emotional and behavioral difficulties (Gartland et al, 2014).…”

“…While separation from an abusive parent or mother's partner may allow children to experience safety (Morris et al, 2020) and enjoy their mother's parenting (Bunston et al, 2021), separation itself does not necessarily mean the end of conflict, with the ex-partner often continuing their abuse (Kaspiew et al, 2017;Mertin & Mohr, 2002), especially in cases where they still have contact with their child (McInnes, 2004). Additionally, some children living in women's shelters following separation may experience villainization of their fathers, which may handicap any relationship they wish to have with them (Bunston et al, 2021). Some of the mothers also had a compromised perception of the needs of their children and themselves (Bunston et al, 2021), and difficulty fulfilling them (McInnes, 2004), which coincides with international literature that shows that some abused mothers had issues perceiving their children's internalizing symptoms (Levendosky et al, 2013), while others see their children as either helpless like themselves or violent like their abusive partners, leading to a withdrawal or rejection in their parenting (Levendosky et al, 2012).…”

“…Additionally, some children living in women's shelters following separation may experience villainization of their fathers, which may handicap any relationship they wish to have with them (Bunston et al, 2021). Some of the mothers also had a compromised perception of the needs of their children and themselves (Bunston et al, 2021), and difficulty fulfilling them (McInnes, 2004), which coincides with international literature that shows that some abused mothers had issues perceiving their children's internalizing symptoms (Levendosky et al, 2013), while others see their children as either helpless like themselves or violent like their abusive partners, leading to a withdrawal or rejection in their parenting (Levendosky et al, 2012).…”

“…Child outcomes following parental separation also emerged as a complicated theme within the literature, with improved outcomes observed for some children following separation (Gartland et al, 2014; Kaspiew et al, 2017), while others experienced adjustment issues both before and after separation (Higgins & McCabe, 2003). While separation from an abusive parent or mother’s partner may allow children to experience safety (Morris et al, 2020) and enjoy their mother’s parenting (Bunston et al, 2021), separation itself does not necessarily mean the end of conflict, with the ex-partner often continuing their abuse (Kaspiew et al, 2017; Mertin & Mohr, 2002), especially in cases where they still have contact with their child (McInnes, 2004). Additionally, some children living in women’s shelters following separation may experience villainization of their fathers, which may handicap any relationship they wish to have with them (Bunston et al, 2021).…”

“…While separation from an abusive parent or mother’s partner may allow children to experience safety (Morris et al, 2020) and enjoy their mother’s parenting (Bunston et al, 2021), separation itself does not necessarily mean the end of conflict, with the ex-partner often continuing their abuse (Kaspiew et al, 2017; Mertin & Mohr, 2002), especially in cases where they still have contact with their child (McInnes, 2004). Additionally, some children living in women’s shelters following separation may experience villainization of their fathers, which may handicap any relationship they wish to have with them (Bunston et al, 2021).…”