Supporting Romantic Relationships During COVID-19 Using Virtual Couple Therapy

Abstract

The novel coronavirus disease pandemic (COVID-19) has profoundly impacted people’s lives, resulting in economic turmoil, death and suffering, and drastic changes to everyday life. The adjustment and strain of such challenges can spill over into couples’ relationship processes, including how partners spend time together, talk to one another, and manage conflict. Drawing from our experiences conducting virtual couple therapy (VCT) in a university-based training clinic and community-based clinic, as well as themes from an informal survey of 29 couple therapy clinicians, the current paper discusses the unique challenges that couples face in therapy during COVID-19. Such challenges include renegotiating quality time together, navigating less personal space and time alone, experiencing individual anxiety and stress prompted by the pandemic, and increases in conflict. We discuss our clinical recommendations for addressing these challenges for couples and utilize clinical case examples to illustrate our points. Despite these challenges, we also comment on several positive aspects of COVID-19 on couple relationships. Guided by these considerations and recommendations, our observations suggest that clinicians can effectively support couples’ growth and progress using VCT during COVID-19.

“Each week feels like a mountain”: The impact of COVID-19 on mental health providers’ well-being and clinical work.

“…In the absence of choices, and in the context of forced telework, it may be critical for second-line workers to have opportunities for choice and screen time breaks throughout the day. We echo the recommendations of O’Reilly Treter et al (2021) on how to reduce the negative impact of screen time on mental health providers during COVID-19: (a) take breaks whenever possible (e.g., taking meetings via phone and psychotherapy sessions via videoconferencing, 5–10 min postsession screen breaks, etc. ); (b) reallocating previous “commute time” toward a self-care activity (e.g., physical exercise or social connection); (c) increasing social support with personal and professional connections where possible to reduce experiences of isolation; and (d) prioritizing self-care activities even more than before COVID-19, including mindfulness, physical exercise, and personal psychotherapy (O’Reilly Treter et al, 2021).…”

“…Mindfulness exercises are a promising type of intervention shown to be effective in reducing stress and increasing compassion (Suyi et al, 2017). Second-line workers may also benefit from personal psychotherapy in order to process their double exposure and develop general stress-reduction coping skills (O’Reilly Treter et al, 2021). In particular, “third generation cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT)” interventions, which incorporate both traditional CBT as well as meditation and mindfulness are demonstrating promising results (Hayes et al, 2004; Morse et al, 2012).…”

Sexual Coping Mechanisms During the COVID-19 Pandemic and Their Determinants of Use, Usefulness, and Effects on Sex Life

“…The importance of relational coping strategies is supported by existing research showing that positive relational experiences are critical to intimacy and sexual connection (Dewitte et al, 2015 ), while the conflict in a relationship is detrimental to sex life (Luetke et al, 2020 ). The quality of sex life is related to the psychological variables underlying the quality of relationships, including communication, sexual compatibility, and emotional support (Delcea et al, 2021a ; O’Reilly Tretter et al, 2021 ; Lopes et al, 2020 ).…”

“…Nevertheless, a thorough literature review revealed hardly any research done on coping with the impacts of the pandemic on sex life. A few examples of conceptual prescriptive articles for sexual health educators and practitioners were identified (Dewitte et al, 2020 ; Lopes et al, 2020 ; O’Reilly Treter et al, 2021 ). Also, some empirical papers have cursorily referred to specific coping strategies, typically relational (e.g., Luetke et al, 2020 ; Rosenberg et al, 2021 ), technological (e.g., porn consumption, sex toys use; Grubbs et al, 2021 ; Mestre-Bach et al, 2020 ; Rodrigues, 2021 ), or innovational (e.g., expanding sexual repertoire through new sex positions and sexual fantasies; Lehmiller et al, 2020 ).…”

Clinical Guidelines When Addressing Abuse over Telemental Health

“…The above strategies can also be used with high-conflict couples. O’Reilly Treter and colleagues ( 2021 ) also recommend that therapists working with high-conflict couples continuously monitor conflict levels, assess the safety of each partner during conflict, and encourage clients to institute de-escalation strategies outside of therapy. Anderson and colleagues ( 2010 ) recommend that therapists working with high-conflict couples focus on personal responsibility of each partner within conflict, as well as use of Cognitive Behavioral or Narrative Therapy interventions to challenge current ways of thinking (e.g., cognitive distortions [CBT], problem-saturated narratives and the influence of dominant discourses that may privilege power/control/violence [Narrative Therapy]) that perpetuate conflict.…”