The American Dental Dream-the cultural desire for straight, white teeth-is difficult, if not impossible, for poor and working-class people to achieve. Using ethnographic fiction, autoethnography, poetry, and qualitative interviewing, I brush away the taken-for-granted assumptions about teeth. I explore the personal, relational, and structural consequences of this cultural desire, and show how social class writes itself on our bodies. I write these culture-centered teeth tales to show how one might cope with their teeth.