Sibling Resentments and Alliances during the Parent Care Years: Implications for Social Work Practice

Abstract

Do many hands make lighter work for siblings caring for aging parents? Anchored in theoretical concepts of filial responsibility and equity, this article is an in-depth examination of tensions between caregiving siblings in two families. This article contributes understandings about ways siblings may differ in their views of parent care and how resentments arising from these differences incline siblings to seek support by aligning with one or more other siblings. The purpose of this examination is to illuminate complex sibling relationships that can impact parent care, and to provoke reflection on social work practices for navigating difficult sibling relationships and promoting high quality care for aging parents. Questions are raised for social workers who may find themselves at the center of competing instructions from siblings who are each proclaiming dedication to "what's best for mom."

‘It is a Big Thing’: Exploring the Impact of Osteoarthritis from the Perspective of Adults Caring for Parents – The Sandwich Generation

“…While some participants described a situation where the caring load was spread between a network of family members, others described a situation where one caregiver assumed an exclusive role in care provision, receiving or perceiving little support from other family members. Resentment of siblings who were not seen to contribute their fair share of caring responsibility has also been identified in other studies, and the importance of equity in caregiving in families has been recognized (Lane et al, ; Lashewicz et al, , ).…”

Caring for parents with end‐stage renal disease: What do adult children face and how do they cope?

“…These daughters described caregiving as a lonely experience and identified situations in which there was a complete lack of support, especially from male siblings. The resentment towards siblings who are dismissive and who do not contribute to their expected share of responsibilities can increase the erosion of family relationships (Barker et al, 2017; Lashewicz, 2014). To date, most studies have focused on the experiences of the marital dyad, showing that haemodialysis demands can disrupt the couple's relational dynamic (Moore et al, 2020; Sousa et al, 2021).…”