While the backlash therapy books may be written in feminist ink, they blot out the most basic precept of feminist therapy-that both social and personal growth are important, necessary and mutually reinforcing (Faludi, 1992, p. 373).Lately, I have had cause to go down to my local chain-bookstore in search of the odd feminist text. Interestingly, I have found these books rmly encased in the self-help section. Feminism's insistence on the personal being political means that it has been relegated to the shelf in the bookstore that explores relationships, spirituality and business success. Feminism is in the process of being incorporated into the self-help genre. The consequences of this con uence are multitude, yet feminism does not appear to be mounting the comprehensive multifaceted response this situation demands. Disturbingly, much of the rhetoric to be found ensconced upon the self-help shelf is strongly anti-feminist: it rei es constructions of gender that second-wave feminism fought against, it continues the misogynist practice of making women responsible-and to blame-for any perceived aw in domestic arrangements and it endorses a capitalist ideology about the power and centrality of the individual. Feminists need to ask themselves how closely do they want to be tied to the self-help movement, what aspects of the genre do they want to incorporate and what aspects do they want to critique or remove?This article uses the oeuvre of John Gray to explore how relationship-focused self-help can be antithetical to some of the primary tenets of second-wave feminism: primarily the aspiration for equality between the sexes, both within the home and workforce. Very traditional and restrictive notions of gender and sexual relationships underpin the content of Gray's books. My critical analysis of his work is tempered by a sympathetic consideration of his audience. By considering not only why Gray is repellent, but also why he is attractive, I will suggest a space for feminist appropriation. For the question looms, why is Gray's audience so enamoured with his books? For captivated they are-John Gray (1992) burst onto the self-help scene with Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. 1 Since then he has added to his interplanetary communication guides with