Queering singlehood: Examining the intersection of sexuality and relationship status from a queer lens

Abstract

This paper uses a queer theoretical lens to redefine family boundaries and structures by exploring LGBTQIA+ and single adults' relationships through the interconnectedness of their marginalized histories. Queer theory both centers LGBTQIA+ lives and deconstructs normativities. The overlapping history of singlehood and LGBTQIA+ will be explored using examples including romantic friendships, same‐sex couples and legal marriage, family of choice, and relationship anarchy. These examples explore how LGBTQIA+ people have often been considered single or choose new interpretations of singlehood (e.g., solo polyamory). The paper also explores how single people have often been considered outside the heterosexual norm. Thus, how these lived experiences deconstruct heteronormativity and can deconstruct mononormativity, amatonormativity, and homonormativity is examined. Understanding and acknowledging family lives beyond these normativities will build toward a more inclusive family and relationship science.

Exploring Aromanticism Through an Online Qualitative Investigation With the Aromantic Community: “Freeing, Alienating, and Utterly Fantastic”

“…Slowly, scholarly work is moving to explore and acknowledge wider forms of partnerships outside of monogamous, romance-oriented relationships (Lavender-Stott, 2023 ). Our participants described how their aromantic identity challenges amatonormative expectations surrounding partnerships.…”

“…The experience of love is tethered to culture and in Western societies love is traditionally mononormative—that is, emphasizing romantic connection with only one other (Füllgrabe & Smith, 2023 ; Moors et al., 2021 ). Moreover, it is anchored in a hierarchy of relationship types, where heterosexual marriage occupies the most valued position (Lavender-Stott, 2023 ).…”

Three methodological approaches to studying singlehood

“…The growing body of research exploring the lives of singles is not only a reflection of changing lifestyle patterns but arguably also a result of increasing attention (of researchers, academia, and society) to the issue of diversity and intersecting identities more broadly. Yet, ironically, even this new research attention to singlehood has been primarily conducted with an explicit or implicit focus on those pursuing “normative” relational structures (Lavender‐Stott, in press). Expanding the composition of the study samples is of importance in this area moving forward, particularly in light of the current discussions regarding the heteronormative bias evident in relationship science in general (McGorray et al., 2023; Thorne et al., 2019).…”

Single and flourishing: Transcending the deficit narratives of single life

“…"Who would you say is your family now?," Lavender-Stott and Allen (Lavender-Stott & Allen, 2023) asked 13 lesbian and bisexual women in the US, ages 53-72, who had been single (not legally married and not in a long-term relationship) for at least five years. In response, they named members of their families of origin, such as as well as friends, ex-partners, and children (see also Lavender-Stott, 2023). The inclusion of members of their families of origin was especially noteworthy.…”