Parental Alienation and the Dynamics of the Enmeshed Parent-Child Dyad: Adultification, Parentification, and Infantilization

Abstract

When caregivers conflict, systemic alliances shift and healthy parent-child roles can be corrupted. The present paper describes three forms of role corruption which can occur within the enmeshed dyad and as the common complement of alienation and estrangement. These include the child who is prematurely promoted to serve as a parent's ally and partner, the child who is inducted into service as the parent's caregiver, and the child whose development is inhibited by a parent who needs to be needed. These dynamics-adultification, parentification and infantilization, respectively-are each illustrated with brief case material. Family law professionals and clinicians alike are encouraged to conceptualize these dynamics as they occur within an imbalanced family system and thereby to craft interventions which intend to re-establish healthy roles. Some such interventions are reviewed and presented as one part of the constellation of services necessary for the triangulated child.

Parental alienation: Targeted parent perspective

“…This results in the child irrationally denigrating the alienated parent while expressing strong allegiance to the alienating parent. Ultimately, this can result in the alienating parent eradicating the relationship between the child and the targeted parent (Bernet, Von Boch-Galhau, Baker, & Morrison, 2010;Garber, 2011). There is currently no agreed upon definitive set of behaviours that constitute parental alienation, however, parental alienation is understood to involve a number of tactics used by the alienating parent in an attempt to program the targeted child to reject the targeted parent (Bond, 2008;Gardner, 2002;Hands & Warshak, 2011).…”

The Chameleon Child: Children as Actors in the High Conflict Divorce Drama

“…Estrangement or realistic rejection describes the child's resistance to or rejection of Parent B due to direct experience of Parent B's relatively insensitive, unresponsive, or inappropriate caregiving behaviors (Drozd & Olesen, 2004;Lee & Olesen, 2001). Enmeshment describes a corruption of roles and boundaries between the child and Parent A, such that the child is, for example, enlisted as that parent's ally or caregiver (Garber, 2011). The enmeshed dyad often resists separation, contributing not only to the child's resistance to contact with Parent B, but to other age-appropriate activities as well.…”

Sherlock Holmes and the Case of Resist/Refuse Dynamics: Confirmatory Bias and Abductive Inference in Child Custody Evaluations

“…More commonly, professionals endorse a three‐factor or “hybrid” approach to understanding resist/refuse dynamics (Fidler & Bala, ; Friedlander & Walters, ; Garber, ; cf., Meier, ). This approach asks the evaluator to assess whether and to what degree a particular child's polarized position might be due to some combination of alienation, estrangement, and enmeshment.…”