“Once Bitten, Twice Shy? Gender Differences in the Remarriage Decision after a Gray Divorce”

Abstract

Gray divorces, or divorces at and over the age of 50, are increasing in the United States. This article explores this population's interest in remarrying after a divorce by sex within the context of a prospective, role exit theoretical framework. In‐depth, qualitative interviews with 40 women and 39 men who have experienced a gray divorce were analyzed using grounded theory methodology. There were significant gender differences with respect to receptivity to remarriage among those who had undergone a gray divorce. More specifically, the most common theme expressed by women involved firmly rejecting remarriage as a part of their futures. The remaining themes articulated by women were conditional pro‐remarriage views and then even less commonly, unconditional pro‐remarriage views. In contrast, the most common theme among men was that they remained very open to remarriage, either unconditionally or under specified conditions; only a small number rejected the prospect entirely. These findings highlight the differences in the remarriage decision from both the female and male perspectives for this population.

Older adults on the dating market: The role of family caregiving responsibilities

“…Their partnering plans were shaped by the type of partners available, their own position, and how that kind of relationship would impact them. Crowley (2019a) had related findings, with nearly half of older divorced women's preference to stay unmarried, followed by being open to an egalitarian marriage, and men being very open to marriage. Similarly, in this research, older women preferred relationships without gendered caregiving, followed by independence rather than caring for an ill partner.…”

“…Single older women have generally sought a degree of independence in dating and repartnering and felt remarriage or cohabitation would require relinquishing the independence they gained from divorce or widowhood (Bulcroft & Bulcroft, 1985; Davidson, 2001; Talbott, 1998). Crowley (2019a) found nearly half of women rejected marriage, some accepted marriage with egalitarian conditions, and few were unconditionally pro‐marriage. Men, on the other hand, were overwhelming pro‐marriage, either conditionally or unconditionally; few rejected marriage.…”

Gendered repartnering in later life: structural and processual dimensions of the transition into new relationships

“…At the same time, studies show that repartnered widow(er)s do not feel like they betrayed their former partner (Davidson, 2002;Stevens, 2004), despite their ongoing bond to the deceased (Dekel et al, 2022). Divorced or separated individuals often do not want to repartner because of the fear of experiencing another rejection or disappointment (Crowley, 2019). However, comparisons illustrate consistently that divorced or separated individuals are more likely to repartner than widowed individuals (Treas and Van Hilst, 1976;Schimmele and Wu, 2016;Brown et al, 2018;Rapp, 2018).…”

The stability of singlehood: Limitations of the relationship status paradigm and a new theoretical framework for reimagining singlehood

“…Given the rise in gray divorce, which are divorces involving spouses over age 50 (Brown & Lin, 2012), and gendered trends in repartnering (Crowley, 2019; Rosenfeld, 2018), the population of older singles has also increased substantially over time. While these singles may not show as high of desire for romantic partnership compared with younger never‐married singles, evidence suggests that older single adults are open to future potential relationships amid concerns about aging and declining health (Davidson, 2001; Timonen & Doyle, 2014).…”