Negotiating Space with Family and Kin in Identity Construction: The Narratives of British Non-Heterosexual Muslims

Abstract

This paper highlights significant moments, strategies, and themes in British nonheterosexual Muslims' management of familial and kin relations. Significant sociocultural and religious factors constitute the framework within which they negotiate such relations. These factors are: the strict religious censure of non-heterosexuality (specifically homosexuality) based on various Islamic written sources, the pervasive cultural censure of homosexuality as a 'western disease', the expectation of marriage as a cultural and religious obligation, the respect for parents, and the maintenance of family honour (izzat) particularly in the close-knit kinship network. These factors, which significantly inform the participants' responses and experiences, also reflect the social position of this religious and ethnic minority in British society. Specifically, the participants highlighted the complexity of secrecy, silence and discretion in balancing individualism (ie expression of sexuality) and socioreligious obligations. In general, the data demonstrate the intricate inter-relatedness of structure and agency, and the cultural embeddedness of the production and management of identity and social relations.

Muslim Men, Racialised Masculinities and Personal Life

“…The relational construction of racialised Muslim masculinities positions Muslim men as self-interested defenders and chief beneficiaries of a deeply patriarchal, oppressive culture and religion (Razack, 2004). This reflects that hegemonic patterns of masculinity and compulsory heterosexuality are embedded in dominant cultural practices in Muslim families (Charsley, 2005;Charsley and Liversage, 2015;Yip, 2004). Evidence indicates that cultural ideals of purdah and honour regulating gender relationships affect men and women unequally, with attention paid to the detrimental impact on women (Samad, 2010;Shaw, 2000: 164).…”

“…This avoids overstating the role of culturally-situated, unequal power relations in explaining changing family formations and relationships, as highlighted by the cultural pathologisation of Muslim families (Alexander, 2004;Alexander, Redclift and Hussain, 2013). Muslim men are simultaneously viewed as autonomous individuals who are free to exercise agency, and patriarchal authority, and as actors operating within the constraints of rigid cultural forms, including hierarchical Muslim families (Shaw, 2000;Yip, 2004). Focusing on forms of relationality and connectedness encourages exploration of the multifaceted, inter-connected ways in which Muslim men experience themselves in relation to others.…”

Beforeplay: Family stories, teen and adult parents and sexual health communication.

“…Sexual identity and sexual behaviour is sometimes related to self-respect and shame in research, with youth participants describing their sexuality using ideas of a reputable, decent or moral self (Froyum, 2007;Matyastick, Baier, & Wampler, 2008;Yip, 2004). Describing the self as respectable presumably positions a person against a disrespectable other (Froyum, 2007), designating sexuality as something that only those with little regard for positive selfconcept would enjoy.…”

“…Mothers in a faith-based sexuality program felt there is a need for integration of sexuality into the tenets of church education (Cornelius, 2009), and grandparents also recognized church as a source for sexuality education for youth and caregivers (Cornelius, LeGrand, & Jemmott, 2008). Other researchers noted that religiosity impacted the types of sexuality discussions that occurred in the family (El-Shaieb & Wurtele, 2009;Yip, 2004), sometimes offering a "reactionary" foundation upon which sexuality is developed (Donnelly, p. 1610; see also Lefkowitz, 2005;Ruocco, 2010 (Wood,age 20) Although mass media is sometimes described as having a negative influence on youth (see MacBeth, 2004;Peremans et al, 2000) out-of-school literacies also offer participation in informal learning and alternative methods of communicating, hooks (1994) describes music as a method of reflecting upon cultural values. She notes that it is "important to see 'mis'…”

“…Parents respond differently when they feel that youth have acknowledged cultural practices in enacting sexuality (Holland et al, 1998). This includes acknowledging the importance offamilism, including interdependence of the family and community (Aukrust, Edwards, Kumru, Knoche, & Kim, 2003;Greenfield et al, 2000;Munoz-Laboy et al, 2009), the importance of family honour in making decisions about communication and sexuality (Munoz-Laboy et al, 2009;Wang et al, 2009;Yip, 2004), and displaying respectful behaviour both within and outside of the family context (DuBois, 2008;Greenfield et al, 2000;Munoz-Laboy et al, 2009). …”