“My village fell apart”: Parents' Views on Seeking Informal Mentoring Relationships for Their Children

Abstract

Objective To assess parents' perceptions of barriers and facilitators to promoting informal mentoring relationships for their children with caring adults in their existing social network. Background Supportive relationships with nonparental adults are critical to positive youth development, social capital, healthy living, and upward mobility, but not all children experience such relationships. Because parents are the primary gatekeepers to children's social networks, we presumed that parents could play a role in shaping children's informal mentoring relationships. Method We conducted eight focus groups and used a semistructured interview to ask participants about mentoring and potential barriers or facilitators to connecting children with informal mentors. Participants were 55 parents/caregivers (Mage = 41.43 years; 96.4% female; 77.9% unmarried). Results Parents were open to the involvement of nonparental adults in children's lives, but they differed in the extent to which their social network offered viable mentor candidates. Other barriers included feeling too proud to ask for help and concerns that informal mentors would be unsafe or inconsistent. Facilitative factors included appreciating the benefits of informal mentoring relationships, feeling connected to one's community, and being able and willing to ask for help in the face of doubt or fear. Conclusion Parents were generally positive about children receiving support from informal mentors and acknowledged the potential role they could play in forming those connections; they also recognized potential barriers to making those connections. Implications Parents' perception about their “village” suggests the need to develop and evaluate programs that help parents connect children with supportive informal mentors.

Perceived barriers, relationship quality, and informal mentors: Adolescents' preference for disclosing about dating violence

“…Our findings suggest efforts that focus on promoting relationships with informal mentors could pay important dividends in a number of domains, especially if these relationships were established before youth began to form dating relationships (Cavell et al, 2021). In fact, there could also be value in interventions that guide parents and other caregivers toward connecting adolescent youth with supportive adults in their community (Weiler, et al, 2020a; 2020b). There might also be value in developing and evaluating formal mentoring programs designed specifically to prevent the negative sequelae of ADV.…”

Informal mentoring support as a potential moderator of the relation between adolescent dating violence victimization and substance use

“…To the degree adolescents are likely to disclose about ADV to a supportive informal mentor (Mapes & Cavell, 2021), parents should consider the potential benefits of promoting their children's involvement in safe, supportive informal mentoring relationships (Sourk et al, 2019). Similarly, for teachers, counselors, and other professionals who interact with victims of ADV; although we know relatively little about the formation of informal mentoring relationships for at-risk youth, there would appear to be a role for those adults who are already in their social network (e.g., Weiler et al, 2020). Less clear is how the current findings could be used in the context of formal prevention efforts to enhance the protective role of existing informal mentoring relationships.…”

Needs of Youth and Parents From Multi-Problem Families in the Search for Youth-Initiated Mentors

“…Research on youth mentoring naturally tends to focus on the relationship between mentor and child (Keller, 2005). However, theoretical (Keller, 2005) and empirical (Basualdo-Delmonico & Spencer, 2016; Weiler et al, 2020) literature suggests that parents also contribute to the success or failure of mentoring. That is, parents are the primary gatekeepers of children’s social networks (Kesselring et al, 2012), thus the relationship between a child and mentor may depend on the relationship between the parent and mentor.…”

“…Parents indeed appreciate having a say in selecting mentors (Spencer et al, 2019) and generally prefer mentors who they know and trust so they feel comfortable in letting their child spend time with them (Spencer et al, 2019; Weiler et al, 2020). Yet, parents often accept their children’s choice, although they may have different perspectives on who would be the best mentor (van Dam et al, 2019).…”