Men’s Grief, Meaning and Growth: A Phenomenological Investigation into the Experience of Loss

Relationality and Finitude: A Social Ontology of Grief

“…How this effort has resulted in personal and existential growth is described in several of the reviewed studies. In Spaten et al (2011), 'the participants all spoke of having learned a number of things as a result of their experience of loss' (p. 10), thus confirming several of the aspects mentioned by Tedeschi & Calhoun (2007). The participating middle-age Danish men testify to existential and spiritual growth, a greater appreciation of life, and a more caring and tolerant way of being with others, a development that is seen as a result of an intense existential struggle.…”

“…The process of meaning-seeking in Daggett (2002) is likewise stimulated by a feeling of having lost part of oneself and a 'desperate' struggle to find some meaning to this: 'There has to be a reason'. Participation in the study is here regarded as an integrated part of this struggle, the hope being that sharing the story will make it more bearable (See also : Spaten, Nørremark Byrialsen & Langdridge, 2011).…”

“…This is actualised both in relation to family, the extended network, and the social system. Spaten et al ( 2011) argues that men's reactions of anger after losing a partner might have 'resulted in a rage that potentially disconnected them from others who may have been able to offer comfort and support'. This confirms Walter's (1999) suggestion that the clinical lore within grief research is centred around the normative assumption that 'it is good to talk', which might undermine alternative ways of coping.…”

“…'To continue living' demands an active stance, and the process of grieving is often referred to as a 'struggle' (Spaten et al, 2011;Lowe & McClement, 2011). Many of the bereaved refer to themselves as 'survivors' (Danforth & Glass Jr, 2001), and grief is not seen as a natural process but something that requires an immense effort.…”