Is There Space for Our Stories? An Examination of North American and Western European Gay, Bi, and Other Men Who Have Sex with Men’s Non-consensual Sexual Experiences

“You’re Gay, It’s Just What Happens”: Sexual Minority Men Recounting Experiences of Unwanted Sex in the Era of MeToo

“…However, an underlying belief that unwanted and non-consensual sex are unavoidable was evident across the sample: if "you're gay, it's just what happens." While our analysis echoes previous research arguing that GBM can "normalize" sexual coercion and sexual pressure (McKie et al, 2020), our findings also demonstrate how some GBM are resisting this "normalization." Though participants communicated experiences of unwanted sex as common, they did not necessarily consider these to be acceptable.…”

“…Their participants often engaged in unwanted sex without direct pressure, but rather from "prescriptive cultural norms including dominant discursive constructions around masculinity and male sexuality" (p. 355), which come to frame GBM as always desiring and willing to have sex (for example, pornography). McKie et al (2020) found similar dynamics in their mixed methods study on GBM in North America and Western Europe conducted in early 2015. They also noted power imbalances between receptive (bottom) and penetrative anal sex partners (tops); challenges with finding the right moment to negotiate consent; forced insertion and HIV risk; the diversion of sexual advances; and the pervasiveness of casual sexual harassment in GBM venues (e.g., grabbing, forced kissing).…”

“…These findings indicate that some GBM may feel obligated to have sex after an initial understanding that sex is on the table (Braun et al, 2009;McKie et al, 2020). By comparing their experiences of uncomfortable encounters to more severe cases of sexual violence or coercion (e.g., Weinstein), and making themselves accountable for needing to be more assertive in sexual negotiations, the participants often normalized these moments of unwanted sex.…”

“…There has been growing scholarly interest in the topics of unwanted sex and sexual violence among gay, bisexual, queer, and other men who have sex with men (GBM) (Felix et al, 2021;De La Ossa, 2016;McKie et al, 2020;Salter et al, 2020;Sternin et al, 2021). Approximately 30%-47% of GBM report experiencing a sexual assault over their lifetime (Black et al, 2011;Chen et al, 2020;Rothman et al, 2011).…”

Justifications for heavy alcohol use among gender and sexually diverse people

“…Heavy alcohol use to negotiate the complexity within these settings was viewed as essential. In line with international research, bars and other commercial venues selling alcohol were identified as important places for socialising (Croff et al, 2017;Emslie et al, 2017b), as was the role of peer expectations in encouraging drinking (Longerbeam et al, 2007;McKie et al, 2020;Morris et al, 2020;Robertson & Tustin, 2018). Additionally in the New Zealand context, there was recognition that non-alcohol venues and opportunities for socialising are not readily available for gender and sexually diverse people, something that has been reported elsewhere .…”