Expressions of Queer Intimacy: BDSM and Kink as Means of Self-Actualization

Abstract

Traditional concepts of sexuality and intimacy contain normative assumptions that limit the fluidity and creativity with which individuals’ relational, gender, and affectional identities can be expressed. This theoretical article applies the seven axioms of Hammack et al.’s paradigm of queer intimacy to a case study of a client who identifies as queer, kinky, poly, transmasculine, and neurodivergent. The resulting conceptualization illustrates ways in which kink and bondage/domination and sadomasochism can contribute to identity development, congruence, and self-actualization. Implications for counseling are provided along with humanistic themes found within the case study. Humanistic counselors can connect more authentically with queer, kinky, polyamorous clients by acknowledging the diversities of clients’ identities and behaviors and increasing counselor competencies related to queer, kink, and poly cultures and practices.

Kinky Sex and Deliberate Partner Negotiations: Case Studies of Canadian Transgender Men Who Have Sex with Men, Their HIV Risks, Safer Sex Practices, and Prevention Needs

“…As a crucial point of clarification, when kinky sex was mentioned or discussed by the three TMSM participants in our case studies, they were referring to the catch-all term for a range of sexual practices that included BDSM, role play, fetishes, and other sexual practices that essentially involved consensual deliberate partner negotiations, as well as pleasurable experiences for all of the parties involved. Although it is beyond the scope of this article to present an elaborate discourse on kinky sex that explicitly discusses the complex relationship between kink and trans masculinity, it is important to acknowledge that there is published academic literature available that discusses this relationship in greater detail [ 71 , 72 , 73 ].…”