Confidants and Companions in Later Life: The Place of Family and Friends

Abstract

Responses from a sample of 400 older persons were used to determine the relative importance of various family members (spouse, children, siblings, other relatives) and friends in the confidant and companion networks of later life. Significant differences exist among older persons (based on gender, marital status, and availability of children) in the salience of these ties as confidants and companions. There are also major differences in the configuration of the confidant vs companion networks. These variations are discussed in the context of the hierarchical-compensation, task specificity, and functional specificity of relationships models of support. The findings demonstrate that a distinction regarding availability of kin must be made among those who never had a particular kin tie (e.g., the childless and single), those who have lost a previous tie (e.g., the widowed), and those whose tie lives far away.

Off the Beaten Track

“…The networks of the childless might be specifically vulnerable in late life. As has been established repeatedly (Campbell, Connidis, and Davies 1999;Connidis and Davies 1990;Kendig et al 1988), they are more likely than parents to have network ties with age peers (friends, colleagues, cousins) and for that reason are more likely to lose network members with increasing age. Previous losses of age peers might also account for the smaller networks of the lifetime childless, particularly among the oldest.…”

The Role of Generativity in Psychological Well-Being: Does it Differ for Childless Adults and Parents?

“…Our finding that these direct effects were no stronger for female non-parents than female parents may be due to the fact that childless women tend to be heavily engaged with their families of origin (Allen 1989;Connidis and Davies 1990), and many traditionally ''female'' occupations (e.g., teaching, nursing, social work) also offer extensive opportunities to engage in personal care and mentoring. Clearly, more research is needed to gain a better understanding of the variety of factors associated with developmental outcomes based on sex and parental status.…”

“I’m not the same person since I met you”: The role of romantic passion in how people change when they get involved in a romantic relationship

“…In addition, individuals who keep a good social network when involved in a romantic relationship tend to meet various developmental challenges (e.g., marriage, child bearing, widowhood, etc.) with better outcomes (e.g., Connidis and Davies 1990;Dykstra 1995;Magnusson et al 1985). In sum, individuals who withdraw from their friends and relatives when they are in a romantic relationship would appear to cut themselves off from people who could help them maintain a strong and thriving romantic relationship.…”