Avoidance of Intimacy: An Attachment Perspective

Abstract

A basic principle of attachment theory is that early attachment relationships with caregivers provide the prototype for later social relations. Working within an attachment framework, a new 4-group model of characteristic attachment styles in adulthood is proposed. In particular, two forms of adult avoidance of intimacy are differentiated: a fearful style that is characterized by a conscious desire for social contact which is inhibited by fears of its consequences, and a dismissing style that is characterized by a defensive denial of the need or desire for greater social contact. This distinction corresponds to two differing models of the self: people who fearfully avoid intimacy view themselves as undeserving of the love and support of others, and people who dismiss intimacy possess a positive model of the self that minimizes the subjective awareness of distress or social needs. The emotional and interpersonal ramifications of the two proposed styles of adult avoidance are discussed.

What's sex got to do with it? Attachment, love schemas, and sexuality

“…Considering only the four types interested in romantic relationships, the behaviors and attitudes of the Secure type were particularly distinct from the other types. Consistent with previous research (Bartholomew, 1990;Bartholomew & Horowitz, 1991;Brennan & Shaver, 1995;Collins & Read, 1990;Griffin & Bartholomew, 1994;Hazan & Shaver, 1987;Kirkpatrick & Davis, 1994;Latty-Mann & Davis, 1996), the Secure type was notable in its commitment and trust in relationships and in its sexual restrictiveness. The Clingy (Anxious) type displayed the expected love preoccupation and fear of loss.…”

“…This distinct pattern of results for the Casual type reinforces the importance of allowing individuals to classify themselves as disinterested in romantic relationships. Second, the different patterns of response by Fickle (Fearful, Ambivalent) and Skittish (Dismissing) types further document the usefulness of four-category rather than three-category schemas of individuals who are interested in romantic relationships (Bartholomew, 1990;Bartholomew & Horowitz, 1991).…”

“…For example, the Secure type has been found to be highly satisfied with romantic relationships, trusting of partners, committed to their relationships, and low in game-playing and obsessive dependency; the Anxious type has been shown to be low in satifaction with romantic relationships and trust in partners, and high in obsessive commitment to their relationships; and the Avoidant type has been found to be low in commitment to romantic relationships and low in partner trust, and high in game-playing and deception (Collins & Read, 1990;Keelan, Dion, & Dion, 1994;Simpson, 1990). Bartholomew (1990;Bartholomew & Horowitz, 1991;Griffin & Bartholomew, 1994) reconceptualized Hazan and Shaver's model as a 2 X 2 typology. This typology consists of a combination of positive versus negative views of self (I do/do not deserve love and support) and positive versus negative views of others (others are/are not trustworthy and accepting).…”

“…Recently, Hatfield and Rapson (1996) developed a unified theory of love schemas by integrating stage theory (Erikson, 1982) with previous typologies from attachment theorists (e.g., Bartholomew 1990;Bowlby, 1979;Hazan & Shaver, 1987;Latty-Mann & Davis, 1996). Rapson (1995, 1996) argue that although early life relationships with caregivers are important in the formation of adult love schemas, people also undergo a number of developmental tasks beyond infancy and childhood that influence their adult attachment styles.…”

Attachment styles, grief responses, and the moderating role of coping strategies in parents bereaved by the Sewol ferry accident

“…Attachment models have been conceptualized with two dimensions that underlie adult attachment styles: avoidant attachment and anxious attachment (Bowlby, 1980). Individuals with a highly avoidant attachment style generally struggle for independence and maintain emotional distance from significant others (Bartholomew, 1990; Mikulincer, Birnbaum, Woddis, & Nachmias, 2000; Mikulincer, Gillath, & Shaver, 2002). Individuals with a highly anxious attachment style are excessively dependent on significant others and worry that persons in close relationships with them will not be available or supportive in stressful times (Fraley & Shaver, 1997; Mikulincer et al, 2000).…”