‘A way to be me’: Autobiographical reflections of autistic adults diagnosed in mid-to-late adulthood

Abstract

In this article, we report on an oral history study documenting the lives of autistic adults in Australia. This qualitative study, co-produced with autistic researchers, offers insight into the lived experiences of autistic adults diagnosed in mid-to-late adulthood. Oral history methodology was utilised to understand the experiences of autistic adults who grew up in an era before autism was well-known. The 26 interviewees were born before 1975, receiving a clinical autism diagnosis after age 35 years. All interviews were conducted by autistic researchers, transcribed and thematically analysed by a team of autistic and non-autistic researchers using the six-step process outlined by Braun and Clarke. We identified four themes relating to perceptions of the self: being different, exploring identity, the suffering self and being Autistic. Some interviewees reported a direct relationship between trauma, negative self-conceptions and suffering. For most, formal diagnosis had positive impacts on sense of self, contributing to a greater focus on strengths. Contra research suggesting autistic impairments in self-awareness, these interviewees demonstrated a deep capacity for self-reflection, highlighting the variability of autistic lives and the socio-historical contexts that shape individual biographies, including experiences of stigma and discrimination as well as the empowering potential of identifying as autistic. Lay abstract Using oral history methods, we interviewed and recorded 26 autistic adults in Australia about their life history. We wanted to better understand interviewees’ self-reflections about their lives. The interviewers were autistic researchers and the interviews were analysed by autistic and non-autistic researchers. All of the adults we interviewed were born before 1975 and formally identified as autistic after age 35 years. This group of people is sometimes referred to as ‘late-diagnosed autistic adults’. In general, there is not much research done about autistic adults and even less is known about those diagnosed late in life. In this article, we explore what these adults said about their sense of self and how that changed over time. These autistic adults told us about many negative experiences, including trauma, which had shaped how they think about themselves. For most, autism diagnosis had a very positive impact on their sense of self, allowing them to understand more about their own past and to feel good about their autistic identity. Previously some researchers have said that autistic people have a limited or impaired sense of self. Instead, our results show some autistic people can actually reflect deeply on their lives and their changing sense of self-identity over time.

“Peas in a pod”: Oral History Reflections on Autistic Identity in Family and Community by Late-Diagnosed Adults

“…Our findings suggest that late-diagnosed Autistic identity narratives are inherently social, being produced through interaction with and reference to others, drawing on discourses that frame autism as a shared way of being in the world and that explicitly value Autistic community. Previously we have argued that, contra research suggesting autistic impairments in self-awareness, our late-diagnosed interviewees demonstrate a deep capacity for self-reflection (Lilley et al, 2021). The current analysis strengthens and extends this argument.…”

“…The present study contributes to a small but gradually expanding body of qualitative research investigating the experiences and perceptions of late-diagnosed autistic adults. In a previous article (Lilley et al, 2021), we analysed perceptions of self-identity among the same group of latediagnosed autistic adults, drawing on oral history interviews. In oral history, the aim is to record recollections, preserving voices and perspectives, often of those marginalised in conventional histories (Pellicano et al, 2020).…”

A capabilities approach to understanding and supporting autistic adulthood

“…For example, little is known about the diagnostic experiences of autistic adults with intellectual disability 24 , about how autism is identified in different cultural contexts or about adult autistic experiences in the Global South 298 . It is likely that autistic adults in many low and middle-income countries do not have access to formal diagnosis, post-diagnostic supports or the positive transformations in self-understanding and connections to a peer community that often accompany diagnosis 181 , 217 , 261 .…”

“…A substantial minority of autistic adults have co-occurring intellectual disability (29% 179 ) and some do not use speech to communicate 180 , which can make it difficult for others to gain insight into their thinking. However, research demonstrates that autistic people have a deep capacity to reflect on many aspects of the self, regardless of their intellect or communication preferences 181 , 182 .…”

“…Because all of a sudden you are in a community with someone where you are on the same wavelength … it is a really strong experience” 216 . Such autistic-to-autistic interactions promote self-understanding 181 , 214 , 217 , positive self-identity 217 , 218 and well-being 219 .…”