Recent research on Frequency Reuse (FR) schemes for OFDM/OFDMA based cellular networks (OCN) suggest that a single fixed FR cannot be optimal to cope with spatiotemporal dynamics of traffic and cellular environments in a spectral and energy efficient way. To address this issue this paper introduces a novel Self Organizing framework for adaptive Frequency Reuse and Deployment (SO-FRD) for future OCN including both cellular (e.g. LTE) and relay enhanced cellular networks (e.g. LTE Advance). In this paper, an optimization problem is first formulated to find optimal frequency reuse factor, no of sectors per site and number of relays per site. The objective is designed as an adaptive utility function which incorporates three major system objectives 1) spectral efficiency 2) fairness, and 3) energy efficiency. An appropriate metric for each of the three constituent objectives of utility function is then derived. Solution is provided by evaluating these metrics through a combination of analysis and extensive system level simulations for all feasible FRD's. Proposed SO-FRD framework uses this flexible utility function to switch to particular FRD strategy, which is suitable for system's currant state according to predefined or self learned performance criterion. The proposed metrics capture the effect of all major optimization parameters like frequency reuse factor, number of sectors and relay per site, and adaptive coding and modulation. Based on the results obtained, interesting insights into the tradeoff among these factors is also provided.